10 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Has To Be


BY: Tim Hoch

Original Post

1.You ascribe intent.

Another driver cut you off. Your friend never texted you back. Your co-worker went to lunch without you. Everyone can find a reason to be offended on a steady basis. So what caused you to be offended? You assigned bad intent to these otherwise innocuous actions. You took it as a personal affront, a slap in the face.

Happy people do not do this. They don’t take things personally. They don’t ascribe intent to the unintentional actions of others.

2. You’re the star of your own movie.

It is little wonder that you believe the world revolves around you. After all, you have been at the very center of every experience you have ever had.

You are the star of your own movie. You wrote the script. You know how you want it to unfold. You even know how you want it to end.

Unfortunately you forgot to give your script to anyone else. As a result, people are unaware of the role they are supposed to play. Then, when they screw up their lines, or fail to fall in love with you or don’t give you a promotion, your movie is ruined.

Lose your script. Let someone else star once in awhile. Welcome new characters. Embrace plot twists.

3. You fast forward to apocalypse.

I have a bad habit of fast forwarding everything to its worst possible outcome and being pleasantly surprised when the result is marginally better than utter disaster or jail time. My mind unnecessarily wrestles with events that aren’t even remotely likely. My sore throat is cancer. My lost driver’s license fell into the hands of an al-Qaeda operative who will wipe out my savings account.

Negativity only breeds more negativity. It is a happiness riptide. It will carry you away from shore and if you don’t swim away from it, will pull you under.

4. You have unrealistic and/or uncommunicated expectations.

Among their many shortcomings of your family and friends is the harsh reality that they cannot read your mind or anticipate your whims.

Did your boyfriend forget the six and a half month anniversary of your first movie date? Did your girlfriend refuse to call at an appointed hour? Did your friend fail to fawn over your tribal tattoo?

Unmet expectations will be at the root of most of your unhappiness in life. Minimize your expectations, maximize your joy.

5. You are waiting for a sign.

I have a friend who won’t make a decision without receiving a “sign.” I suppose she is waiting on a trumpeted announcement from God. She is constantly paralyzed by a divinity that is either heavily obscured or frustratingly tardy. I’m not disavowing that fate or a higher power plays a role in our lives. I’m just saying that it is better to help shape fate than be governed by it.

6. You don’t take risks.

Two words: Live boldly. Every single time you are offered a choice that involves greater risk, take it. You will lose on many of them but when you add them up at the end of your life you’ll be glad you did.

7. You constantly compare your life to others.

A few years ago I was invited to a nice party at a big warehouse downtown. I was enjoying the smooth jazz, box wine and crustless sandwiches. What more could a guy want? Later in the evening I noticed a steady parade of well-heeled people slide past and disappear into another room. I peeked and saw a large party with beautiful revelers dancing and carrying on like Bacchus. Suddenly my gig wasn’t as fun as it had been all because it didn’t appear to measure up to the party next door- a party I didn’t even know existed until just moments before.

I do this frequently. Those people are having more fun. Mary has a bigger boat. Craig gets all the lucky breaks. Ted has more money. John is better looking.

Stop it.

Always remember what Teddy Roosevelt said: “Comparison is the thief of joy.”

8. You let other people steal from you.

If you had a million dollars in cash under your mattress, you would check it regularly and take precautions to insure it is safe. The one possession you have that is more important than money is time. But you don’t do anything to protect it. In fact you willingly give it to thieves. Selfish people, egotistical people, negative people, people who won’t shut up. Treat your time like Fort Knox. Guard it closely and give it only to those who deserve and respect it.

9. You can’t/won’t let go.

These are getting a little harder aren’t they? That’s because sometimes you have to work at happiness. Some hurdles are too difficult to clear by simply adjusting your point of view or adopting a positive mindset.

Do you need to forgive someone? Do you need to turn your back on a failed relationship? Do you need to come to terms with the death of a loved one?

Life is full of loss. But, in a sense, real happiness would not be possible without it.  It helps us appreciate and savor the things that really matter. It helps us grow. It can help us help others grow.

Closure is a word for people who have never really suffered. There’s no such thing. Just try to “manage” your loss. Put it in perspective. You will always have some regret and doubt about your loss. You may always second guess yourself. If only you had said this, or tried that.

You’re not alone. Find someone who understands and talk to that person. Reach out for support. If all else fails, try #10 below.

10. You don’t give back.

One way to deal with loss is to immerse yourself in doing good. Volunteer. Get involved in life.

It doesn’t even have to be a big, structured thing. Say a kind word. Encourage someone. Pay a visit to someone who is alone. Get away from your self-absorption.

When it comes down to it, there are two types of people in this world. There are givers and there are takers. Givers are happy. Takers are miserable. What are you?

Welfare Users LIVID When They See THIS Grocery Store’s Embarrassing Demand…


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Not sure if this is the right way to go about it… But I for one am tired of people abusing the system. To me, welfare should only be accepted in grocery stores, and only for basic items, meat, milk, grains, veggies and fruits.. Not lobsters and chips, pop or any junk food…. And all items should be the store brands, or least expensive options. It may sound cruel, but hey, if I can’t afford lobster for a family then why should my tax dollars be used to purchase it for others. Welfare is suppose to be an hand up, not a lifestyle…


 

can imagine the howls.  Wawa is “shaming the poor.”

The comedian [Jay McGuire], who operates on social media under the moniker “The Philly Offensive,” put the signs up on his own accord for his and everyone else’s entertainment. He’s in no way associated with Wawa, but he used their stores without their knowledge to see how welfare users and sympathizers would react to the truth.

As of this writing, over 4,000 people shared his photo post of the awesome sign, proving that those who work to pay the bills are fed up with freeloaders who don’t work. But according to a writer at The Frisky, McGuire and anyone else who thought this was funny are incredibly misinformed and callous.

Hello! Count me among the callous.

The Ultimate List of Hobbies for Men: 75 Ideas For Your Free Time | The Art of Manliness


readingIn the days of old, leisure time was not thought of as a chance to “veg out,” but as an opportunity to pursue one’s passions and interests — an outlet for the sides of a man that were not stimulated in his professional vocation. Hobbies were deemed important for the way in which they can strengthen every part of a man’s life. They can bring you joy, increase your eye for detail, keep your mind sharp, expand your creativity, help you meet friends, and teach you valuable skills. In short, hobbies add interest to your life and help you become a more well-rounded man.

Unfortunately, we now often spend our leisure time camped out in front of the TV or computer. We feel that modern life has become so busy and stressful (even though it hasn’t) that when we have free time, laying on the couch is all we can manage.

Yet if you’ve been feeling depressed, restless, anxious, and in need of real refreshment, the problem may be a lack of activity, rather than too much of it.

As Winston Churchill, a vigorous hobbyist, put it:

“It is no use saying to the tired ‘mental muscles’… ‘I will give you a good rest,’ ‘I will go for a long walk,’ or ‘I will lie down and think of nothing.’ The mind keeps busy just the same. If it has been weighing and measuring, it goes on weighing and measuring. If it has been worrying, it goes on worrying…It is useless to argue with the mind in this condition…A gifted American psychologist has said, ‘worry is a spasm of the emotion; the mind catches hold to something and will not let it go.’ One can only gently insinuate something else into its convulsive grasp. And if this something else is rightly chosen, if it is really attended by the illumination of another field of interest, gradually, and often quite swiftly, the old undue grip relaxes and the process of recuperation and repair begins.”

For those of you who want to have an engaging hobby, but aren’t sure what pastime to pursue, we’ve created a couple guides to hobbies over the years. Yet even after the second was published, we continued to come up with more ideas. So we decided to compile all the old ideas along with the new into one ultimate list of hobbies for men. This still isn’t an exhaustive list, but there is surely something that will catch your eye, or will spur you to think of one yet unmentioned.

Our hope is that every man is able to find a hobby that can turn into an enjoyable pastime during the current season of his life, and maybe even become an enduring passion that lasts a lifetime.

via The Ultimate List of Hobbies for Men: 75 Ideas For Your Free Time | The Art of Manliness.

10 Ways to Better Utilise Your Time After Work


Workdesk-with-phone-and-notebook-1024x615During our lives we constantly strive for accomplishments in our career, and we educate ourselves to reach certain goals according to our ambitions. Being successful in the field we love brings us a lot of happiness, as well as a substantial paycheck at the end of the month, which allows us to provide for our family and go on vacations, have a nice life, and buy some unnecessary material things that simply make us happy.

However, in these busy lives we lead, we mustn’t forget that at the end, success will mean nothing if we forget about our loved ones, and let them forget us. You are never too busy to do everything you want after work, but all you need is a little guide to help you better utilize your limited free time.

via 10 Ways to Better Utilise Your Time After Work.

Document Lists 1063 Times Obama Has Been Caught Lying | ReaganCoalition.com


President Barack Obama is perhaps one of the most dishonest presidents we’ve ever had in the White House, and that is saying a lot.

Time and time again, the American people have been deceived by Obama and his promises. When he was being elected, Americans held on to the hope that he could actually provide the change he promised. Unfortunately, that change has only been for the worst.

Now, a new site has released a list of 1,063 of Obama’s lies. You can read the full list here.

via Document Lists 1063 Times Obama Has Been Caught Lying | ReaganCoalition.com.

ISIS Throws 15-Year-Old Boy Off Rooftop For ‘Being Gay’ Even Though An ISIS Militant RAPED Him – Chicks On The Right


I just don’t know what to say… Sick…. Sick… Sick…

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In what world does this make sense?

While liberals in NYC get their panties in a wad over pronoun usage, Muslims in the Middle East are murdering those accused of engaging in homosexual behavior.

Notice I said those “accused of engaging in homosexual behavior.” Half of the time, these people aren’t even homosexuals (not that it changes anything).

via ISIS Throws 15-Year-Old Boy Off Rooftop For ‘Being Gay’ Even Though An ISIS Militant RAPED Him – Chicks On The Right.

Public school recruits students to work for Hillary Clinton campaign | Fox News


Have they no shame?

A public high school in Maine was caught red-handed trying to recruit students to work on Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign as a “community service opportunity” – without the knowledge or consent of parents.

Could you imagine the national media firestorm had the school been recruiting for Donald Trump’s campaign?

Students at Marshwood High School in South Berwick received an email from the Clinton campaign – urging them to sign up for positions as unpaid “fellows”.

via Public school recruits students to work for Hillary Clinton campaign | Fox News.