Race in America


The battle cries of America

“Black Lives Matter”

“Hands up, don’t shoot”

“Boycott the Oscars”

The new cry is

If trump wins, I’m moving to Canada”…

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Is this the America we want to live in? An America that runs, an America that see’s everything in Black or White, or better yet, as Black or White? I think not!

To me, America is much more than that, to me America is a country that has shown great strides and growth. A little over 7 years ago we elected the first Black President, Obama, he won twice. Yet some still cry racism…

Did the election Obama eradicate racism in America, no? Will anything eradicate racism in America, sadly, no? Racism in like a cancer on America, yet we are defeating it, but like a cancer, it never truly will go away.

Why, you may ask… Because we will always have ignorant people in this country, on both sides; Racism is not just a white person’s problem, its every living souls problem. All cultures and raciest have been and still are raciest. Does that mean we ignore the problem? Do we just sit back and stop calling out the raciest for what they are, ignorant people filled with hate?

No, we fight it, but to win the fight, we need to stop calling things and people raciest if they are not. We need to stop looking behind every motive and event to try and find that one thing, that one issue that we can call raciest. We need to start seeing and understanding that people can have differences, and they can dislike someone just for who they ate and not what color they are. I dislike Obama, not because he is black, but because his policies are hurting America. I dislike Obama because, in my eyes, he does not have the best interest of America in mind. He promised to fundamentally transform America, yet I feel there is no need to do so. America, at its core, is a strong nation, one with a good and solid backbone. Is she perfect, no she is not? America has lots of work to do, but division is not the way to accomplish it. And in my eyes, Obama has done more harm to race relations in this nation that any living person I know of. Granted, I do not know every American, but of all the people on the big stage of American politics, Obama is the most divisive by far.

Some may be saying, Hey Trump is a raciest… I truly have not seen that. Some will say he won’t condemn the KKK, sorry, I say him say it several times, that he disavowed them… Now, do I know Trumps or Obamas heart, nope, I can only go on what I see on the news or read.

NOTE:  Just so you know, I read both liberal and conservative reports and watch both conservative and liberal news cast. Also, I am not a big Trump fan, I do like some of his stances on issues, but overall, and he is not my top choice for President.

Having said all that, back to the main point:

To the Oscars, Hollywood is one of the most liberal places in America, yet they still seemed to be called raciest… Odd really… Do we really want a quota at the Oscars? Could it be that the voting panel just didn’t see any worthy performances? Could it be that the actors and actresses of color just didn’t have any stand out rolls? I don’t know, I don’t go to the movies a lot, but I am inclined to believe that that is the case. Why do I feel that way…

Because Hollywood would be the first to jump on the bandwagon on race relations, they love looking like the great healer of the nation, and they are extremely liberal and will pick up any opportunity to make the conservatives look bad.

The battle cry of “Raciest” is strong, but if we keep using the word to describe any white person who dislikes any black person, of any perceived “white” organization snubbing blacks, then we will never get over racism. All we will do is cheapening the word. I have seen this already, the term raciest and come to mean, “You don’t agree with my point of view”. We have cheapened the value of the word, and soon it will have no meaning at all.

Words have value, they meaning. If we use words incorrectly, the value and meaning get lost. Epic is a great example. For a long time everything was epic. Someone went to lunch and had a good burger, all of a sudden, that burger that lunch becomes Epic… Nope I think not… Or how about the word fuck, do you realize that it was not even a word in the beginning, it was an acronym, it was originally spelled F.U.C.K… Each letter representing a word, For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge, Yet, now, the word is common place and has not true value to it.

Race relations will not improve until we learn that we cannot have the concept of “The Same but Different”… What does that mean…

  • Why is it racist to say I have white pride, yet not to say I have black pride?
  • Why is it not raciest to have the BET (Black Entertainment Television station), yet it would be if there is a WET?
  • Why is a White shooting a Black raciest yet a Black shooting a White not?
  • We have the NAACP, yet no WAACP

I could go on, but I will not, I think my point is made.

The argument that Blacks cannot be raciest, is, in-of-it-self raciest. You cannot disqualify on group from the act because of their color and state that that’s not a raciest act.

Our roads in America where paved with good intentions, over the years and throughout history, America has strived to right the wrongs, yet some of the acts where, in-fact, raciest.

Example, when a collage entrance exam for Whites and Blacks are the same, but the points needs differ based on color. That, my friends, is raciest. If Blacks and Whites are to be equal, then all test, exams and interviews must be conducted and counted equally. We cannot have 2 sets of standards and call ourselves non raciest. The very fact that we are applying two different criteria for the same position is, inherently, raciest.

America has a lot of work to do, but it will not change based on the governmental actions, it will only change with the conversation of the intellect and heart. Until we are willing to step up to the plate as individuals, take responsibility for our own actions, and understand that others may not like us, for a multitude of reasons, one being our skin color, and until we learnt that, hey, that’s OK, you don’t have to like me, and that does not make me any less of a person.

This is how we will change and grow. We neeed to keep calling out the bad in the America, we just don’t need to see bad in everything, there is a lot more good in America than bad.

God Bless

Paul Sposite

Kaizen: Get a Little Better Each Day | The Art of Manliness


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It’s happened to all of us.

You have a “come to Jesus” moment and decide you need to make changes in your life. Maybe you need to drop a few pounds (or more), want to pay off some debt, or desperately long to quit wasting time on the internet.

So you start planning and scheming.

You take to your journal and write out a bold strategy on how you’re going to tackle your quest for self-improvement. You set big, hairy SMART goals with firm deadlines. You download the apps and buy the gear that will help you reach your objectives.

You feel that telltale rush that comes with believing you’re turning over a new leaf, and indeed, the first few days go great. “This time,” you tell yourself, “this time is different.”

But then…

via Kaizen: Get a Little Better Each Day | The Art of Manliness.

Via Negativa: Addition by Subtraction | The Art of Manliness


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It’s a new year and people all over the world are making resolutions on how they’re going to improve themselves. Usually these goals consist of doing something new or adding a habit to their lives: get back into exercising, start journaling, launch a side hustle, adopt the Paleo diet, earn more money, etc.

But after a few weeks of motivated effort, most folks start to lose steam. They stop going to the gym, never sign up for that woodworking class, and go back to eating Pop Tarts and Doritos. And then they feel like crap because they haven’t made any progress on improving themselves.

There’s nothing wrong with making these types of positive goals, but they’re not the only way to improve your life. Just as effective as adding something to our lives, if not more so, is subtracting the things that might be holding us back.

In truth, oftentimes the path to becoming a better man is found in following the via negativa — the negative way.

via Via Negativa: Addition by Subtraction | The Art of Manliness.

Is there such a thing as real gentlemen?


Searching the web for interesting content to post to my Guided Insight Facebook page I ran across an article  12 Things A Real Gentleman Does Differently, I found the article too be interesting, and it made me think…. “Hmmm, do they even exist anymore?”.

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Can a society of self absorbed, gadget loving, constantly plugged in really care about opening doors for someone? Can a nation that believes in the murder of innocent lives, labeled as pro-choice, really respect anyone? Can a people so concerned about political correctness and offending others really be honest and open?

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I think not…

The whole idea of a young man, or for that matter, almost any man, young or old, acting in a gentlemanly way is too foreign to us, sad to say, but it is true. In a nation where the president talks hip-hop to the youth, how is that acting like a gentlemen?  Our leaders should be our best examples to follow. when sport starts steal crab legs and rappers derogate women, how do we expect our young men to grow into being a gentlemen?

We cannot except what we do not teach. We are a nation of selfies and instagrames a nation of self promotion, feel good, do as I please as long as I enjoy it. We have allowed the nation to fail our youth, yet we still expect them to be OK… We, ourselves have failed, yet we expect them to learn the lessons we are unable to teach.

Five Boys

Can we, can America, can our young boys become young men who will become Gentlemen, yes, they can, but it has to start with a cultural change, a shift away from the self promotion lifestyle.  we have to shift to a lifestyle that promotes others, the common good and respect for self and others. It can be done, but it wont be easy. Just dressing up the outside with nice suits and hat does not make one a gentleman, it just makes them a nice looking young man or boy. Being a gentlemen is more than that, yes the appearance makes a huge difference, but in-of-it-self does not make the man into a gentleman.

We, as a people, as a nation, as individuals, as men and women, have a lot of work to do… But it can be done…

 

 

God Bless

Paul Sposite

It’s your ATTITUDE not your APTITUDE that determines your ALTITUDE


It’s your ATTITUDE not your APTITUDE that determines your ALTITUDE

May 01, 2013

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To be successful in any area in life you need to have the right attitude, which means you have to approach any task or job with determination, tenacity and above all plenty of enthusiasm.

In business, when it comes to choosing the right individual for a certain post or promotion, I have always gone for people who have PMA – in other words Positive Mental Attitude.

Leadership and business management comes with its own set of challenges and pressures and it is a common mistake to let these problems and distractions become the major focus – that is why it is so important for senior managers to always look forward rather than backwards.

Of course, it is important for people to have skills, training and experience but I have always been a huge believer in putting attitude above aptitude. You can come fully equipped for a role but without real enthusiasm the best skill-set will count for very little. You can train somebody and give them the tools but you can’t give them the right attitude.

In my view there are two types of people in this world, and those who take the glass half empty approach are simply setting themselves up for failure no matter what targets they set themselves.

In any situation in life, people are looking for leaders to guide and direct them. That is particularly the case when you are going through a difficult or challenging period in the development of a company. Always remember there is only one person watching them and hundreds watching you.

I have always been a believer in leading by example and the nature or character of an organization is more often than not shaped by the person at the top – that is why it is so important for senior executives to set the right tone and atmosphere.

Staff can instinctively grasp when something is not right within a business and it is vital not to panic and send out the wrong message during those difficult times and tough trading conditions – in other words stay positive.

More importantly, having the right attitude can have a real impact on the business in terms of its performance. There are too many organizations which allow a blame culture to flourish without properly understanding the negative effect it can have on the business.

When I have a bad month in my organization, I get the senior management team together to discuss the reasons why performance isn’t the best. About 20 per cent of the meeting is normally taken up with looking at exactly what went wrong and the rest is spent discussing how to put the problem right.

Of course, it is really important to understand why something has not worked but it is even more important not to get caught up with the process of looking backwards. A firm which prefers to look to the past rather than to the future is always going to struggle in the long term.

The key to real success is an ability to adapt to change, and that will never happen if you approach every challenge with a negative attitude. People with the right mental attitude can always take something positive from a difficult situation and most important of all, will be constantly looking at ways of moving a business on to the next stage of its journey or development.

James Caan

http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20130501104129-32175171-it-s-your-attitude-not-your-aptitude-that-determines-your-altitude

I hope you enjoyed…

God Bless

Paul Sposite

Guided Insight Life Coach

Holistic Health


I believe in natural remedies and try to use them when ever I can, luckily I have a holistic doctor I trust with my life. Dr. Kim has been able to get me off of all my prescription and on to natural supplements  and I have never felt better, except one thing that never seemed to go away, my constant feel of no energy  I was tired from the time awoke until the time I went to bed, nothing the doctors (Dr. Kim and my MD) did seemed to help, until I discovered ASEA, a water supplement that has changed everything.

What is ASEA

It’s not just natural. It’s native.

ASEA is trillions of stable, perfectly balanced Redox Signaling Molecules suspended in a pristine saline solution—the same molecules that exist in the cells of the human body.

Redox Signaling is a function that is central to all life on the planet. Redox Signaling molecules are created within every cell of the body and are vital to the immune system and to cellular healing mechanisms. They are so essential to life that without them, you would die within seconds. A proper supply of Redox Signaling molecules enables cellular healing: damaged, dysfunctional cells fading away and healthy, vibrant cells taking over.

Redox Signaling molecules are vital for the health of your cells; that’s why your body makes its own supply. But after the age of 12, our cells make fewer and fewer of these molecules. ASEA is the world’s only source for replenishing Redox Signaling molecules.

http://paulsposite.teamasea.com/src/enterprise/images/5IJKUEGSATFRNARGVGYRVJEHTICSKHQJDFSGABBBCJLYLNRIHOI881.jpg

I have taken ASEA for about one week now, and truth be told, I felt it taking effect from day one, my energy levels have never been higher. But it is not like a caffeine buzz, no energy drink high than crash, just a nice, natural energy flow… I can’t explain it, and I wont try, but I will tell you, You Need To Try ASEA For Yourself and See! 

Check out my website: http://paulsposite.teamasea.com/Default.aspx and find out more….

ASEA web

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Spring Cleaning: A Leadership skill


Spring is a time for cleaning, you know, Spring Cleaning…

– Yard work

– All the closets in the house

– The Garage

– The Windows

– The Walls

Every surface and every corner gets a good deep cleaning, places you haven’t looked at all winter and now you are obligated to, for Spring Cleaning is a passage, a passage from the bleak dark days of winter in to the glory of spring and all she offers. The new growth, the smells and the sun. Yep, spring cleaning is as much apart of spring as Halloween is of autumn. And for the most part, we look forward to spring cleaning because we understand the importance of it. Not just the simple fact that we are clearing out the dust of the past 8 months, but there is more to it, it goes deeper than just that. There is something about it, something that seems to touch our deepest being.

How do I know this, just look at that facts, a quick search on Amazon for books on spring cleaning and I get 2201 hits, and a Google search returns about 112,000,000 hits…. Now tell me that people don’t feel a deep need to clear out the dust and cobwebs once per year, starting off fresh and new.

Now, I offer you Spring Cleaning: A Leadership Skill, a skill that every leader or want-to-be leader needs in their tool box. So what is it, what exactly is Spring Cleaning for Leaders? Well it’s not cleaning out the old corner office nor is it having all the workers clean up the work place. It’s not a fresh paint job, although all those things should be done from time to time. But that’s not leadership, that’s cleanliness.

Spring Cleaning Leadership has more to do with the person than the possessions. It’s a time for a leader to stop and look deep into the corners of their minds, to scrub every surface of their hearts and to open up the windows of their souls and let the fresh air in, once again.

Cleaning the deep corners of the mind

This is a perfect time to look at your deeply held thoughts and beliefs, a time to reevaluate your long-standing positions and to seek out new ways to approach issues, people and life. Lets say that you have always held the position that your job, as a leader, has always been one of dictatorship, that you give orders and they follow. And lets say that it has worked for you, that over the years people have always said that you’re a dictator, but you always get the job done right and on time. Over all, not a bad record. The job is done and on time and as a bonus, it was done right the first times.

So your thinking, great, this leader can skip the first step, they have no room for change or improvement. Why mess with what works… As the old saying goes, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

But lets look at it anyway, lets pretend…

So what would the leader have to look at, what corner of the heart needs fixin’? Well, a lot of the depends on what the leader considers important in their life. Is the only goal to complete the task or do they see more? Do they see personal development of their people as important? Or is it just get the job done, do what you have always done, the same way you always have, we have a proven method that has worked for years and years and will continue to work for years to come. We are like a well oiled machine, no monkey wrenches needed.

Sure, the job will get done, and sure it will be right the first time, but are we missing something that may have improved it, something that may have saves time, effort or money? Maybe that person you hired to do job “X” had a new idea that would have save time and effort for the person doing job “Z”… Or maybe the person doing job “X” would be better at job “Z”… the possibilities are endless, yet we will never know them if we hold true to our deepest convictions that this is the way its done, always has been and always will be…

 

Even the best leaders can get caught in the trap of familiarity. So spring is a perfect time to re-examine your methods.. Are they really the best way or just the known way?

 

Scrubbing every surface of the heart

Leaders, true leaders are servants, and must have a servant’s heart. This is a fact, not just a nice saying. Someone can be the boss and call themselves a leader, but if they do not have a servant’s heart they are nothing more than a boss. And truth be told, anyone can be a boss, its really not to hard to “boss” people around. But a leader, a true leader, they are few and far between, leaders grow into true leadership, it is rare to find a natural servant leader, it is more often than not that the person worked long and hard scrubbing the surfaces of their heart before anyone would truly call them a servant leader. So what exactly is scrubbing of the heart, and how does one do so?

We all have dark places with in our heart, places where we hold deep grudges or prejudices. Places within our hearts where the light of servanthood cannot and does not shine. Places that even we fear to go. It is exactly those places that we must scrub. But how? How does one scrub the deep dark places of the heart…

Work, lots and lots of work… Prayer and humility are the best places to begin.

Lets look at the example from above, the same leader who got the job done on time and right every time. Once again, not a bad thing, and lets say that over all they are open-minded to new and different approaches… So, so far a good leader, they allow people of offer new ways of doing things, and allow people to try new and different jobs, if time allows for it and the circumstances are appropriate.

That’s a good over all rule, one would not want to risk messing up on a major project, sometimes the old ways are the best ways. But if the job is less risky and time permits, it makes sense to allow a little experimentation to take place.

But now lets say that such a job was taking place, a job that allows for this. Perfect… So worker “A” wants to try their hand at something new, they ask for the opportunity and its granted… Perfect… so far… worker “B” also asks to try their hand at something new, but this time is denied. Now lets say that both workers have the same level of experience and time on the job, that both workers are qualified to do the tasks at hand, but for some unknown reason, worker “B” is denied.

The leader gave a reason, something along the line of, we just can’t afford to put you on that job, you are needed here. Sounds good, in fact it sounds like a complement. Sounds like you are so valuable to the task at hand tat we can not afford to risk losing you to the other job.

Here is where the leader must stop and look deep within… Is that the real reason or is there a deeper darker reason. Is it because the person is no the same-sex, age, race or religion as they are? Is it because once, many moons ago they did or said something that you found hurtful or offensive, or maybe once, in the distance past, they messed up a job, and you had to take the blame for it… There can be millions of reasons why… But none are valid.

It is time to scrub the heart, to remove the old hurts and hate and to replace it with understanding and forgiveness. You may not like that person very much, on a personal basis, but that should have no bearing on the job at hand. If they can do the work and do it to the standards that everyone else on the team must meet, than they should be given the opportunity, to succeed or fail, the same as anyone else.

But change does  not happen over night, it is a long and hard process, one that needs to be worked on little by little… The first step is for the leader to recognize that there heart needs a good spring cleaning, the second step, list the dirty spots down, know what needs to be scrubbed away. And the lest step, start cleaning, pick one dirty spot, clean it and then move on to the next. Just like cleaning the walls of your house, you don’t move around randomly from wall to wall, spot to spot… You pick one wall to start on and clean it before moving on to the next.

Open up the windows of the soul to let the fresh air in

Leadership, authentic leadership, is a relationship with yourself and others, the group and individual. Leadership is never in a void or vacuüm, it is always in the eye of the storm, and this is where we will discover the soul of any great leader.

The image  of the eye of the storm is a strong image, one that invokes many other images, such as power and calmness, force and anti-force. Any great leader will tell you that is with in the storm that leaders are often times born. The forces that play upon the soul of such a person do not destroy them, but rather they ignites within them the sleeping giant that waits to be awaken.

We have all witnessed such leadership, think of times in your life when just the right person steps forward to take control, think of times of tragedy or strife, times of chaos and confusion.

Leaders seem to always emerge from such things. It is the soul that moves them into action. It was the winds of change and chaos that propelled them into the eye of the storm. They opened up the windows within their souls and allowed the wind to blow thru and into their soul. Leaders not by choice but by baptism, baptism of fire.

I could go back to the example I used above, but to  me, it seems it would cheapen the soul to do so. This spring cleaning project stands on its own…

Not every great leader was born of the eye of the storm, but every great leader must walk into that very same eye, and the only way to do so is to open your windows…

So what are the windows of the soul? and how does one open them…?

The eyes are said to be the windows of our souls, and I, for one believe this to be. How often have I heard the phrase, look me in the eyes when you are talking to me… and how often I have said the same… But why… Why is it so important to look into the eyes…

Because we all seem to see something more than just the eyes, we all seem to see deeper…

Leaders need to work with open eyes, nit just eyes that see the task at hand, but eyes the seem to see the underlying current of their team, eyes that can see the slight difference in a persons face or eyes that notice the off color of a persons personality. Eyes that are open to see the colors of the world, even in the darkness of it.

Leaders do not need to be told what is going on, they should be able to perceive it from not what there eyes see but rather from what there eyes tell them. Leaders learn to listen to there eyes (souls) rather then to see with them. The windows of the soul are the eyes that are open, that see the path that leads in the storm, if that is necessary, and out of the storm, if that is required. Leaders think not of the safe exit of themselves, but of the team whom they lead. And the soul, if allowed to do so, will lead them into the storm or around the storm, but it will never avoid the storm.

So how do we open our windows, and allow the fresh air in? We allow the eyes to do the souls bidding, we allow the winds to guide us. But to do this we need to first learn how to open the windows… How to feel the wind upon our soul and how to freely go wear the wind directs.

We have to practice observation, we need to learn to see the tree with in the forest and the breeze upon the leaf. In the office this means seeing everyone as a person, not just a worker, at home this means seeing family members as individuals and not a collective and in the community at large it means seeing each member of the community as a individual being.

For example, how many times have you ever been compared to others, such as, When so-and-so did this job, they did it this way… In the eyes of that person, you are not an individual, but rather part of the collective, many of the one, rather than one of the many. In larger companies this seems to be, more often than not, the case. How often people say, I feel just like a number to them, not a person”. The eyes of the corporation are closed and has no soul. But leaders to, if there eyes are open.

Experiment, learn to see things differently, try to notice one new thing in your office/home/school/community each day, teach your eyes to see deeper and allow your soul to take you… Pray and be still, be open to hear the soul and allow the moment to take you… Like any other skill, this takes practice…

And in the End…

Like anything in life, hard work and dedication to the task at hand is paramount in completing the task, the same can be said for leadership and change. The opportunity to do a little “Spring Cleaning” is an opportunity to start fresh… no examine your life, your leadership and to make changes for the better,

God Bless

Paul Sposite

Guided Insight Life Coach