The other day I made the uncharacteristic mistake of flicking on the TV while I was eating breakfast. I turned to the local news to see what was happening in my neck of the woods and a story came on about the “pick-up” or “dating coach” niche. I already think those fellas are, for the most part, hucksters, and coming at the issue of confidence and meaning in a man’s life from an ass-backwards approach. So when the interviewed fella was wearing sunglasses while talking about how he helps guys gain confidence, all the while clearly putting more thought into the visual image he portrayed than the content coming out of his mouth, I felt reaffirmed in my opinion.
And then the original focus of the interview came up: There had been a complaint that these “pick-up coaches” were holding classes in the streets, where their “students” would practice their tricks and tactics on women in the area. A few women got so upset at constantly being harassed by these males (who were all following a similar script) that they called the local news to complain; they even put up signs warning other women about men who were out just trying to get another notch on their belt or a number in their phone.
There’s so much wrong with this “industry” that I thought it necessary to write about it. Even though many of these dating coaches and pick-up gurus may genuinely think they’re trying to help guys and make them better, the focus of their approach is detrimental; it weakens more than it strengthens, and it gives guys the wrong perspective towards both themselves and women.