Why New Years Resolutions fail… And what you can do about it…

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For last year’s words belong to last year’s language
And next year’s words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.

~T.S. Eliot, “Little Gidding

Good words to start the New Year with. It never fails to amaze me, all the work-up to the year’s end. Truly I don’t get it, new beginnings happen daily, they are in our hands, we choose when to start and when to stop. The New Year is not a magical time, nothing special or unique happens at the stroke of 12, except maybe this:

The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.

~P.J. O’Rourke

But in truth, going from December 31st to January 1st is no different from going from March to April, or Monday to Tuesday. Maybe this is why so many resolutions made on January first fail, we put too much hope and magic into the day. My resolutions are on going and at times ever-changing, I believe in constant change, creating anew continually. The process of change is not magic, you can’t order a new you off a late night TV commercial or schedule an operation to achieve the desired results. There is no magic outside of yourself and God. And we don’t call that magic, we call it faith and grace.

The resolution you made last year, you know the one where you wear going to drop that extra 30 pounds, or the one wear you were going to be a kinder nicer person. How’s that going for you? I am sure some have achieved their goal, but I would venture to guess that a large majority did not.

Sure it lasted a few days, maybe even a month or two, but soon enough it was forgotten about, became to hard or complicated, or it just wasn’t the right time, too much going on in life. Sure, I now the excuses, I used them and sometimes still do. The to much going on and not the right time are two of my favorites for not quitting smoking. But years ago I discovered something, no matter how many times or how sincere I was on New Years eve with my resolution, I always failed. No matter what.. It always seemed that the magic of the night did not translate into the magic of the year. But why?

Because reality sets in, the good feelings, induced by the night, the hoopla and drink seems to wear off by mid-day, and what’s left, LIFE.

So what can I do about it, how do we change this, we don’t, we can’t, so enjoy the night, enjoy the magic why it last, but know one thing, come January 2nd, life returns just like it was December 30th… The magic is gone and reality is back.

But you can make changes to your life, it is possible to create a new you, but there is no magic, only perseverance and hard work. Faith and the grace of God will take you through it.

Here is a short lift of things to help you on your journey:

  1. Make your resolutions/goals achievable
  2. Create a series of “small” goals that will lead to the “larger” goal
  3. Celebrate each small goal achieved
  4. Learn from each failed goal, and you will have them
  5. Never give up
  6. Pray for guidance and grace
  7. Look for support from others
  8. Read for inspiration and support
  9. Keep a journal of your Journey
  10. Seek Help when needed

And the number one thing never to forget:

You have the power to change, the choice is yours, no one else can do it for you, no doctor, no family member, no counselor. Yes, all of them can help you along your path, but in the end only you can change you…

God Bless



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