Feeling sorry for yourself, and you present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have.
-Dale Carnegie
What can we do about this, how can we change our own outlook on our own life? How do we stop feeling sorry for ourselves, stopping the self-pity and self loathing? What can we do to save ourselves from ourselves?
Some points to consider:
- Only you can make you feel bad
- Only you are in control of you
- Only you can fix you
- Only you can do it
We are in control of our own lives, this is a basic and true fact, nothing can change this basic fact. However, being human, being of a fallen nature, we are prone to failure, we are prone to self-doubt we are prone to self-destruction. So how do we change this, how do we get past our fallen human nature? What can we do to become a better person, a person of confidence a person of integrity and person of character?
We can teach ourselves to over come our fallen nature, we can grow above and beyond that, it is achievable, it is with-in our grasps, all we need to do is trust, trust in God, trust that He will provides the graces we need to archive our perfection.
Trust in God does not mean we sit back and do nothing, quit the contrary, trust in God means we buckle down, place our nose to the grind stone, work our fingers to the bones, what ever cleaver little saying you choose. Trust is God is not the easy road, but it is the road less traveled. It is the road to perfection and happiness, it is the road to freedom and salvation, it is the only road to our own personal redemption.
God is our ticket to liberation, liberation from self-doubt, liberation from self-hatred, the two self-defeating attitudes that create the conditions necessary for self-loathing and just plain old feeling sorry for yourself. God and His graces, His love for you and all your imperfections, our ability to accept His love, to use His graces, that’s the way to freedom, the road to liberation.
Sounds easy, who would not want Gods love, who does not want the graces God bestows upon us? Ask almost anyone, and they would tell you, Yep, I want Gods love, I want His grace, not many would out-and-out refuse it. Some do, but most would be more than happy to accept the freely given gifts. So why that do we have so much pain and suffering, why do we have so many people who are full of self-pity and self-hatred?
Because the gifts and love are given freely, but we must be open to and willing to accept them, and simply saying yes, simply using words, dead words, is not enough. Action is required, God wants us to fully participate in His divine plan for ourselves, He wants us to be active, not just a vessel to poor His love and graces into, but an active participant in His love and grace.
What good are gifts, given freely, if we do not use them, what good is love, given unconditionally, if we do not accept it? A gift is only as useful as it is used, otherwise the gift is of no value. We can receive Gods love all daylong, but if we do not open ourselves to this love, if we do not partake in this love, the love is of no value to us. Yes God continues to love us, regardless of our acceptance or not, but the love goes unused, it is not returned nor is it give to others. The love of God is not meant to be buried like a secret love, but to be received and displayed for all to see, and to be given to others as freely as it was given to us.
The act of receiving is not a passive act, it is an act that requires us to participate fully. Consider this, have you ever given a gift to a friend or loved one, a gift that you gave out of no obligation, no requirement, no special occasion. You gave the gift just out of love, given freely, expecting nothing in return. But the recipient was not receptive to your gift, they may have accepted it, they may have even opened it, but they were not receptive. They showed no sign of joy in the act of love, they showed no sign of rejection, they just accepted it. We, the gift bearer, leave feeling rejected, feel that our love was neither accepted nor outright rejected. We think to ourselves, I would rather have them say I reject your gift, I do not want it, than to just accept it with no emotion at all. The act of receiving is active, it requires work on the part of the receiver. It is the same with Gods gifts to us, He freely offers His gifts, He will not force them upon us, we must freely accept them, and just saying yes is like the friend that opened the gift you offered with no emotion, no reaction, just nothingness. The gift, although given was not truly accepted, it was discarded, not with words, but the lack of action.
So what actions, what is required of us, nothing, we are not required to accept Gods graces nor Gods love, just like we are not required to accept gifts on our birthday or at Christmas. We can choose freely to participate in Gods love, just as we choose freely to accept Christmas gifts and attend birthday parties. But once we choose to attend, action is required, input and output are part of the interaction of any social gathering, so is the case with God, He provides the input, and we provide the output. He gives us, freely, His love, the input, and we actively, through our works, provide the output. Notice, God gives freely, and we work actively, it is through the active works we perfect the graces and love of God is fully realized.
So how can God help us get over our self-hate, our feeling sorry for ourselves. What must we do to actively participate in Gods graces and love given freely. How do we perform the work to fully realize the gifts God has given. For each of us God has given the gifts that we need, the gifts that are unique to us, so for each of us the works are also unique, but here is a list of a few things all of us can do to help us realize the full potential of our gifts.
- Pray daily, offer up 30 to 60 minuets per day to God, talk to Him, but more importantly, listen, be still, be quiet, and listen to the loving voice of God. And do not worry if you don’t hear Him the first time or every time you pray, like everything else in our lives, it take practice. So just pray, daily and know and accept that some days will be better than others.
- Read daily, anyone who has read my blog before knew that this would be one of the point, it almost always is. But reading is important, reading opens our minds to new possibilities. Read the bible, read a good solid spiritual book or read a novel, just read and let your mind go, let your mind enter into the story or passage. Let the author take you along for the ride. Read at least 15 minutes per day. God often times speaks to me through the books I choose to read that day, the passage I decide to look up or the magazine I choose out of the stack on my coffee table. God uses the everyday items about us to communicate to us, God comes to the place we are, He does not wait for us to arrive at the place He desires us to be.
- Journal daily, write about your day, write about what you see about you, write about your prayer life, write about what ever you choose to write about. This blog is my journal, it allows me the opportunity to clear my mind, to put down on paper (well in this case, electronic paper) what is on my mind, allows me the opportunity to clear it, to visualize it. God uses these opportunities to speak to us, often times I just sit to write, no idea what I want to write about, just feel the need to clear my mind. It is in these moments that I feel God guiding me more that any other. So journal daily, allow the Holy Spirit to guide your hand across the paper, or in my case the keyboard. Use your time journaling as a time of communion with God.
- Learn daily, learn about your faith, learn about your life, learn about your country learn about wine or basket weaving, just learn, never stop learning. God created our minds to grow, to learn to expand. In the process of learning, we are using one of Gods greatest gifts to us, the gift of knowledge. So learn something new daily, try something new daily. I try to make it a point to learn something new daily, be it a simple fact or a complex idea. Learning about this world, our self, our nation or about basket weaving is learning about God, for through the ordinary we find God.
- Think one positive thought daily, when you are in the mist of a bad day, stop yourself, and think about one positive event that took place that day. There is always one, no day is completely bad. Even Good Friday, the day our Lord was killed upon a cross had a positive moment, the moment He offered His life for our sins. So stop and think, seek out the shinning spot among the darkness of your day. It is in the moment, that spot that God will be found.
- Thank someone daily, always give thanks to all around you, but find someone who needs your thanks more than any other, we find God in our fellow-man, and they find God in us, give freely of your Gift of love from God, by returning to others.
Our works do not purchase Gods love nor are the required, God gives it freely, but our works bring the fullness of Gods love to light. Through Gods love we will learn to love the self, and only through our works will we fully realize that self-love.
God Bless
Paul W Sposite
Guided Insight Life Coach
42.303780
-83.378959
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Augustus Woodward’s plan following the 1805 fire for Detroit’s baroque styled radial avenues and Grand Circus. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I’m a Detroiter, I was born in the city, and I love the city. I no longer live in Detroit, I now live about 30 minutes outside of the city, but still consider myself a Detroiter. It pains me to hear negative news stories of Detroit, but it seems that’s all we ever hear. Murder, Rape, miss use of Government powers, Kids killing Kids, Drugs and other horrid actions. It saddens me when I do venture to the City to see all the majestic buildings and homes is shambles to see the empty lots filled with trash and the parks and streets empty of life.
Detroit is a shell of its former self, many do not know the true Detroit, they only know the current Detroit. The one that is on a path to self destruction, the one that fills the national news with murder and deception. Detroit is more than that, Detroit has 300 years of history, of pride and accomplishments. No, not just Cars and Motown, but Art and Architecture, Culture and Innovation. Detroit is a city of many first, The first expressway, phone book and more. Detroit is not what you think she is, she is a diamond in the ruff.
Detroit…
• is home to the Motown sound founded by Berry Gordy Jr. in 1957
• is home to the first Van Gogh painting in a public collection in the U.S. at the Detroit Institute of Arts, "Self Portrait," Vincent Van Gogh, 1887
• installed the first mile of paved concrete road, just north of the Model T plant, on Woodward Avenue between McNichols and 7 Mile Roads in 1909
• built the nation’s first urban freeway, the Davison, in 1942
• is home to the oldest state fair in the nation — the Michigan State Fair, first held in 1849
• is the potato chip capital of the world, based on consumption
• has country’s largest island park within a city — Belle Isle Park
• is home to the world’s only floating post office, the J.W. Westcott II, can be found on the Detroit River
• is north of Canada
• is second in the nation in fishing rod sales
• shares the world’s first auto traffic tunnel between two nations – the Detroit/Windsor Tunnel
• is home to the tallest hotel in the Western Hemisphere – the Detroit Marriott Renaissance Center, at 727 feet/73 stories
• the nation’s first soda — Vernors — created in Detroit by pharmacist James Vernor in 1862. Detroit is also home to Sanders hot fudge, Better Made Potato Chips, Faygo soda pop, Stroh’s Ice Cream
• has the most registered bowlers in the United States
• was the first city in the nation to assign individual telephone numbers in 1879
History of Detroit
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Ste. Anne de Détroit, founded in 1701 is the second oldest continuously operating Roman Catholic parish in the United States. The present Gothic Revival cathedral styled church was completed in 1887 and serves a largely Hispanic community.[1][2]
The city of Detroit, Michigan, developed from a French fort and missionary outpost founded in 1701 to one of the largest American cities by the early 20th century. As reflected by the emblems on its flag, Detroit has been governed by three world powers: France, Great Britain, and the United States. The city, settled in 1701, is one of the oldest cities in the Midwest. Detroit experienced a large scale fire in 1805 which nearly destroyed the city. After the fire, Justice Augustus B. Woodward devised a plan similar to Pierre Charles L’Enfant‘s design for Washington, D.C. Detroit‘s monumental avenues and traffic circles fan out in a baroque styled radial fashion from Grand Circus Park in the heart of the city’s theater district, which facilitates traffic patterns along the city’s tree-lined boulevards and parks.[3] Main thoroughfares radiate outward from the city center like spokes in a wheel.
During the 19th century, Detroit grew into a thriving hub of commerce and industry, the city spread along Jefferson Avenue, with multiple manufacturing firms taking advantage of the transportation resources afforded by the river and a parallel rail line. Beginning in the late 19th and early 20th century, many of the city’s Gilded Age mansions and buildings arose. Detroit was referred to as the Paris of the West for its architecture, and for Washington Boulevard, recently electrified by Thomas Edison.[1]
Following World War II, the Detroit area emerged as a global business center with the metropolitan area becoming one of the largest in the United States. The Detroit area is the second largest U.S. metropolitan area linking the Great Lakes system. Immigrants and migrants have contributed significantly to Detroit’s economy and culture. In the 1990s and the new millennium, the city has experienced increased revitalization. Many areas of the city are listed in the National Register of Historic Places and include National Historic Landmarks.
Beginnings
The first recorded mention of what became Detroit was in 1670, when the French Sulpician missionaries François Dollier de Casson and René Bréhant de Galinée stopped at the site on their way to the mission at Sault Ste. Marie.[4] Galínee’s journal notes that near the site of present-day Detroit, they found a stone idol venerated by the Indians and destroyed the idol with an axe and dropped the pieces into the river. Early French settlers planted twelve missionary pear trees "named for the twelve Apostles" on the grounds of what is now Waterworks Park.[5]
Statue of French officer Antoine de la Mothe Cadillac commemorating his 1701 landing along the Detroit River.
Siege of Fort Detroit during Pontiac’s Rebellion in 1763.
The British surrender, following the American Siege of Detroit during the War of 1812.
The city name comes from the Detroit River (French: le détroit du Lac Érie), meaning the strait of Lake Erie, linking Lake Huron and Lake Erie; in the historical context, the strait included Lake St. Clair and the St. Clair River.[6] Traveling up the Detroit River on the ship Le Griffon (owned by La Salle), Father Louis Hennepin noted the north bank of the river as an ideal location for a settlement. There, in 1701, the French officer Antoine de la Mothe Cadillac, along with fifty-one additional French-Canadians, founded a settlement called Fort Ponchartrain du Détroit, naming it after the comte de Pontchartrain, Minister of Marine under Louis XIV. Ste. Anne de Détroit, founded July 26, 1701, is the second oldest continuously operating Roman Catholic parish in the United States and the church was the first building erected at Fort Ponchartrain du Détroit.[1][2][7][8]
France offered free land to attract families to Detroit, which grew to 800 people in 1765, the largest city between Montreal and New Orleans.[9] Francois Marie Picoté, sieur de Belestre (Montreal 1719–1793) was the last French military commander at Fort Detroit (1758–1760), surrendering the fort on November 29, 1760 to British Major Robert Rogers (of Rogers’ Rangers fame and sponsor of the Jonathan Carver expedition to St. Anthony Falls). The British gained control of the area in 1760 and were thwarted by an Indian attack three years later during Pontiac’s Rebellion. The region’s fur trade was an important economic activity. Detroit’s city flag reflects this French heritage. (See Flag of Detroit).[1]
The City of Detroit (from Canada Shore), 1872, by A. C. Warren
During the French and Indian War (1760), British troops gained control and shortened the name to Detroit. Several tribes led by Chief Pontiac, an Ottawa leader, launched Pontiac’s Rebellion (1763), including a siege of Fort Detroit. Partially in response to this, the British Royal Proclamation of 1763 included restrictions on white settlement in unceded Indian territories. Detroit passed to the United States under the Jay Treaty (1796). In 1805, fire destroyed most of the settlement. A river warehouse and brick chimneys of the wooden homes were the sole structures to survive.[10]
Father Gabriel Richard arrived at Ste. Anne’s in 1796. While the local priest, he helped start the school which evolved into the University of Michigan, started primary schools for white boys and girls as well as for Indians, as a territorial representative to U.S. Congress helped establish a road-building project that connected Detroit and Chicago, and brought the first printing press to Michigan which printed the first Michigan newspaper. After his death in 1832, Richard was interred under the altar of Ste. Anne’s.[1][2]
Detroit was the goal of various American campaigns during the American Revolution, but logistical difficulties in the North American frontier and American Indian allies of Great Britain would keep any armed rebel force from reaching the Detroit area. In the Treaty of Paris (1783), Great Britain ceded territory that included Detroit to the newly recognized United States, though in reality it remained under British control. Great Britain continued to trade with and defend her native allies in the area, and supplied local nations with weapons to harass American settlers and soldiers.
In 1794, a Native American alliance, that had received some support and encouragement from the British, was decisively defeated by General Anthony Wayne at the Battle of Fallen Timbers. Wayne negotiated the Treaty of Greenville (1795) with many of these nations, in which tribes ceded the area of Fort Detroit to the United States. Detroit passed to the United States under the Jay Treaty (1796). Great Britain agreed to evacuate forts held in the United States’ Northwest Territory. In 1805, a fire destroyed most of the settlement. A river warehouse and brick chimneys of the wooden homes were the sole remains of the structures.[10] Detroit’s motto and seal (as on the Flag) reflect this fire.
God Bless
Paul Sposite
Guided Insight Life Coach
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As part of my weekend mornings, I love to sit and read the news, and now that I have an iPad, not only can I read the news, but now I can read articles from all kinds of different sources. One of my favorite apps for the iPad is Zite, a personalized magazine. Basically it allows you to choose the content, and based on your likes and dislikes, it customizes the content. I love it! I get to read a magazine that truly reflects my interest. I have Religion, Politics, The Beatles, Leadership, Reading and a few other topics all downloading to make my perfect magazine.
This morning as I was reading my Zite, I ran across an article that caught my eye, Thinking About Death Can Lead To A Good Life, definitely not your typical title. So I read it, and found that not only did I agree, but it was something I did naturally, and didn’t even realize the positive effects. So I thought I would share the article with you:
Thinking About Death Can Lead To A Good Life
(source)
Article Date: 22 Apr 2012 – 0:00 PDT
Thinking about death can actually be a good thing. An awareness of mortality can improve physical health and help us re-prioritize our goals and values, according to a new analysis of recent scientific studies. Even non-conscious thinking about death – say walking by a cemetery – could prompt positive changes and promote helping others.
Past research suggests that thinking about death is destructive and dangerous, fueling everything from prejudice and greed to violence. Such studies related to terror management theory (TMT), which posits that we uphold certain cultural beliefs to manage our feelings of mortality, have rarely explored the potential benefits of death awareness.
“This tendency for TMT research to primarily deal with negative attitudes and harmful behaviors has become so deeply entrenched in our field that some have recently suggested that death awareness is simply a bleak force of social destruction,” says Kenneth Vail of the University of Missouri, lead author of the new study in the online edition of Personality and Social Psychology Review this month. “There has been very little integrative understanding of how subtle, day-to-day, death awareness might be capable of motivating attitudes and behaviors that can minimize harm to oneself and others, and can promote well-being.”
In constructing a new model for how we think about our own mortality, Vail and colleagues performed an extensive review of recent studies on the topic. They found numerous examples of experiments both in the lab and field that suggest a positive side to natural reminders about mortality.
For example, Vail points to a study by Matthew Gailliot and colleagues in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in 2008 that tested how just being physically near a cemetery affects how willing people are to help a stranger. “Researchers hypothesized that if the cultural value of helping was made important to people, then the heightened awareness of death would motivate an increase in helping behaviors,” Vail says.
The researchers observed people who were either passing through a cemetery or were one block away, out of sight of the cemetery. Actors at each location talked near the participants about either the value of helping others or a control topic, and then some moments later, another actor dropped her notebook. The researchers then tested in each condition how many people helped the stranger.
“When the value of helping was made salient, the number of participants who helped the second confederate with her notebook was 40% greater at the cemetery than a block away from the cemetery,” Vail says. “Other field experiments and tightly controlled laboratory experiments have replicated these and similar findings, showing that the awareness of death can motivate increased expressions of tolerance, egalitarianism, compassion, empathy, and pacifism.”
For example, a 2010 study by Immo Fritsche of the University of Leipzig and co-authors revealed how increased death awareness can motivate sustainable behaviors when pro-environmental norms are made salient. And a study by Zachary Rothschild of the University of Kansas and co-workers in 2009 showed how an increased awareness of death can motivate American and Iranian religious fundamentalists to display peaceful compassion toward members of other groups when religious texts make such values more important.
Thinking about death can also promote better health. Recent studies have shown that when reminded of death people may opt for better health choices, such as using more sunscreen, smoking less, or increasing levels of exercise. A 2011 study by D.P. Cooper and co-authors found that death reminders increased intentions to perform breast self-exams when women were exposed to information that linked the behavior to self-empowerment.
One major implication of this body of work, Vail says, is that we should “turn attention and research efforts toward better understanding of how the motivations triggered by death awareness can actually improve people’s lives, rather than how it can cause malady and social strife.” Write the authors: “The dance with death can be a delicate but potentially elegant stride toward living the good life.”
Article adapted by Medical News Today from original press release. Click ‘references’ tab above for source.
Visit our psychology / psychiatry section for the latest news on this subject.
—–END—-
I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did… Gives you something to think about… Life is short, make it a great one!
God Bless
Paul Sposite
Guided Insight Life Coach
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As part of my weekend mornings, I love to sit and read the news, and now that I have an iPad, not only can I read the news, but now I can read articles from all kinds of different sources. One of my favorite apps for the iPad is Zite, a personalized magazine. Basically it allows you to choose the content, and based on your likes and dislikes, it customizes the content. I love it! I get to read a magazine that truly reflects my interest. I have Religion, Politics, The Beatles, Leadership, Reading and a few other topics all downloading to make my perfect magazine.
This morning as I was reading my Zite, I ran across an article that caught my eye, Thinking About Death Can Lead To A Good Life, definitely not your typical title. So I read it, and found that not only did I agree, but it was something I did naturally, and didn’t even realize the positive effects. So I thought I would share the article with you:
Thinking About Death Can Lead To A Good Life
(source)
Article Date: 22 Apr 2012 – 0:00 PDT
Thinking about death can actually be a good thing. An awareness of mortality can improve physical health and help us re-prioritize our goals and values, according to a new analysis of recent scientific studies. Even non-conscious thinking about death – say walking by a cemetery – could prompt positive changes and promote helping others.
Past research suggests that thinking about death is destructive and dangerous, fueling everything from prejudice and greed to violence. Such studies related to terror management theory (TMT), which posits that we uphold certain cultural beliefs to manage our feelings of mortality, have rarely explored the potential benefits of death awareness.
“This tendency for TMT research to primarily deal with negative attitudes and harmful behaviors has become so deeply entrenched in our field that some have recently suggested that death awareness is simply a bleak force of social destruction,” says Kenneth Vail of the University of Missouri, lead author of the new study in the online edition of Personality and Social Psychology Review this month. “There has been very little integrative understanding of how subtle, day-to-day, death awareness might be capable of motivating attitudes and behaviors that can minimize harm to oneself and others, and can promote well-being.”
In constructing a new model for how we think about our own mortality, Vail and colleagues performed an extensive review of recent studies on the topic. They found numerous examples of experiments both in the lab and field that suggest a positive side to natural reminders about mortality.
For example, Vail points to a study by Matthew Gailliot and colleagues in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in 2008 that tested how just being physically near a cemetery affects how willing people are to help a stranger. “Researchers hypothesized that if the cultural value of helping was made important to people, then the heightened awareness of death would motivate an increase in helping behaviors,” Vail says.
The researchers observed people who were either passing through a cemetery or were one block away, out of sight of the cemetery. Actors at each location talked near the participants about either the value of helping others or a control topic, and then some moments later, another actor dropped her notebook. The researchers then tested in each condition how many people helped the stranger.
“When the value of helping was made salient, the number of participants who helped the second confederate with her notebook was 40% greater at the cemetery than a block away from the cemetery,” Vail says. “Other field experiments and tightly controlled laboratory experiments have replicated these and similar findings, showing that the awareness of death can motivate increased expressions of tolerance, egalitarianism, compassion, empathy, and pacifism.”
For example, a 2010 study by Immo Fritsche of the University of Leipzig and co-authors revealed how increased death awareness can motivate sustainable behaviors when pro-environmental norms are made salient. And a study by Zachary Rothschild of the University of Kansas and co-workers in 2009 showed how an increased awareness of death can motivate American and Iranian religious fundamentalists to display peaceful compassion toward members of other groups when religious texts make such values more important.
Thinking about death can also promote better health. Recent studies have shown that when reminded of death people may opt for better health choices, such as using more sunscreen, smoking less, or increasing levels of exercise. A 2011 study by D.P. Cooper and co-authors found that death reminders increased intentions to perform breast self-exams when women were exposed to information that linked the behavior to self-empowerment.
One major implication of this body of work, Vail says, is that we should “turn attention and research efforts toward better understanding of how the motivations triggered by death awareness can actually improve people’s lives, rather than how it can cause malady and social strife.” Write the authors: “The dance with death can be a delicate but potentially elegant stride toward living the good life.”
Article adapted by Medical News Today from original press release. Click ‘references’ tab above for source.
Visit our psychology / psychiatry section for the latest news on this subject.
—–END—-
I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did… Gives you something to think about… Life is short, make it a great one!
God Bless
Paul Sposite
Guided Insight Life Coach
Like this:
Like Loading...
Tags: About, actor, actors, Additional, American, analysis, article, articles, attention, attitudes, author, authors, beatles, behavior, behaviors, beliefs, benefits, Bulletin, cemetery, citations, Click, colleagues, compassion, Cooper, Date, Death, destruction, edition, efforts, egalitarianism, empathy, example, examples, exams, expressions, feelings, findings, Fritsche, Gailliot, goals, health, Immo, implication, intentions, iPAD, Iranian, Kansas, Kenneth, Lead, leadership, Leipzig, Life, location, magazine, malady, management, matthew, Medical, members, Missouri, moments, motivations, news, norms, notebook, Participants, past, politics, Positve, psychiatry, psychology, Recent, references, religion, reminders, researchers, Review, Rothschild, Self, social, stranger, strife, subject, tendency, terror, texts, Theory, tolerance, topic, topics, Vail, violence, Visit, workers, Write, Zachary, Zite
You ever wonder what makes people tick, how they process information, I do. But all to often it’s because of there stupidity that makes me think about this. Today is a perfect example.
As I stated in a previous post, my sister is having issues with someone she was trying to help out. The person being helped was ungrateful and selfish. He kids came second at best and she, well she always was first, over everyone and anything else.
Here is a perfect example.
Over the weekend I had her 2 younger boys. the ones that live with my sister. I took them up to Mackinaw for the day, they have never seen the Mighty Mac nor the great lakes and I wanted them to experience it. The day and weekend was perfect, we had a great time. To my shock, there mother called 2 times on Saturday, normally she never calls me to see how her boys are doing. But this weekend she not only called me 2 times on Saturday, but even stopped over on Sunday. I knew something was up, an I figured it was she wanted me to provider her with a place to stay. And I was right, Sunday morning she asked me if her and the 2 boys could move in. I was a little dumbfounded, but held it together. My response, a friendly “No, I don’t have space for you and the boys”. The truth, but not the whole reason. The whole reason, why on Gods green earth, would I take in a person who showed a total lack of respect to me and my sister over the last few months. Why would I take in someone who refused to pay rent, help out with house work and even care for her own two boys. What would posses her to even think I would. Well two things, 1) She thinks she does no wrong 2) her two boys, she knows that both my sister and I love them, and would take them in a heart beat. But I can not, nor would I live with such a selfish person.
This “thinking pattern”, if you can call it that, is a pattern of self destruction and self prophecy.
Self Prophecy
When I first met her, she was telling stories of woe-is-me. And being a person who always looks for the good side of everyone, I figured there must be truth is what she is saying. Maybe not 100% true, but at least 70%. I look for the good in all, she was, for the most part, a engaging person. Had good humor and liked to talk, mostly about herself, but if I was not friends with people just because they find themselves the most interesting topic, I would have fewer friends. But what I discovered over the past months or so, is that she is selfish, and childlike. Her actions are predictors to her future.
I am in the process of gaining guardianship over her eldest son, and the courts, as would be expected, want to know all involved parties and any person or persons who may have an interest in this case,such as he father. Granted, his father lives in Africa, but the courts still want to make sure that he is protected on all sides. As we filled out the paperwork for guardianship, the question of paternal responsibility came up. She informed me that his father was not on the birth certificate and that he had no contact at all with him. So that is what I filled out on the form. Well she was wrong and knew she was wrong. And because she lied, she had to make a petition to the Cameroon councilor and place an ad in the legal paper asking for any objections to the guardianship. I would have taken care of this, but I was leaving for vacation and would not be able to. Even thought it was not my responsibility to do so, I would have done it for the child, not her. So prior to my leaving I explained to her what needed to take place, she got mad, was not happy that the courts did not take her word for it, was not happy that she had to use her time to do all this, was not happy that they just did not do as she asked.
This reaction is not a one time reaction, if it was I may have over looked it, but on several occasions she has shown the same contempt for the American way of life, the way we help others the way we process:
1. The Salvation Army provides food boxes to the needy filled with donated food items. Not good enough for her, she don’t like the food, they should just give her the money and let her spend it on what she wants.
2. Saint Vincent DePaul provides vouchers for clothing, for her and her 3 boys, not good enough for her, she wants new clothing, its ok for the boys, but not her, and they should allow her to spend the vouchers on what ever she wants.
3. Local Catholic Churches providing assorted help require the person requesting the help to fill out a form with your name address and such along with a copy of your ID. Not her, they should not request any information, they should just give her what she wants, no questions asked.
When she would complain about such “harsh” treatment, I would just tell her that some people abuse the system and that they are a charity and need to protect themselves so they can help the people who truly need the help. Her response, “They should just give me what I want, why can’t the Government just provide for me”. My response “Because we are not a socialistic country, and the charities provide for you out of the goodness of the American people who donate.”
Nope, not for her, the Government should give her what she wants, not the charities, because the charities want to make her responsible, and she don’t want that.
So her actions have dictated her current situation. Today she is moving out of my sisters house, she has no plan, and cares little for what happens to her kids. They did not attend school today, and who knows were they will end up.
I am heart broken that her two younger boys will most likely not be a part of my life. That she is willing to uproot her boys for her own selfish reasons. But I can not control her actions, directly, but I can make sure that her actions are in the best interest of her kids. I will be calling her eldest sons case worker to let him know that she has moved out, so he can follow up and make sure that the two boys are in a safe environment. It is all I can do at the moment, that and pray that they will be safe and happy. And pray that we, my sister and I, will still be able to be apart of there lives.
I just don’t understand how some people think, or better yet, how some people seem not to think.
Pray for them…
God Bless
Paul
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IN CONGRESS, JULY 4, 1776
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguishe
d destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.
Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.
— John Hancock
New Hampshire:
Josiah Bartlett, William Whipple, Matthew Thornton
Massachusetts:
John Hancock, Samuel Adams, John Adams, Robert Treat Paine, Elbridge Gerry
Rhode Island:
Stephen Hopkins, William Ellery
Connecticut:
Roger Sherman, Samuel Huntington, William Williams, Oliver Wolcott
New York:
William Floyd, Philip Livingston, Francis Lewis, Lewis Morris
New Jersey:
Richard Stockton, John Witherspoon, Francis Hopkinson, John Hart, Abraham Clark
Pennsylvania:
Robert Morris, Benjamin Rush, Benjamin Franklin, John Morton, George Clymer, James Smith, George Taylor, James Wilson, George Ross
Delaware:
Caesar Rodney, George Read, Thomas McKean
Maryland:
Samuel Chase, William Paca, Thomas Stone, Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Virginia:
George Wythe, Richard Henry Lee, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Harrison, Thomas Nelson, Jr., Francis Lightfoot Lee, Carter Braxton
North Carolina:
William Hooper, Joseph Hewes, John Penn
South Carolina:
Edward Rutledge, Thomas Heyward, Jr., Thomas Lynch, Jr., Arthur Middleton
Georgia:
Button Gwinnett, Lyman Hall, George Walton
What more needs to be said…
God Bless and may God continue to Bless America
Paul
| Jeremiah 17:9-10“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? "I the LORD search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve.”
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Yesterday was Fathers Day, so to all the dad’s Happy Fathers Day! The word dad is a lot larger than the 3 letters that make it up, the word dad encompasses a whole concept and radical idea, or at least in today’s world it seems radical. As of late the media has been hot and heavy on the idea of downplaying the rolls of dad’s in the family life. their have been several articles published about how the man is not a necessary part of family life, and some that have even gone so far as to state that the dad is a detriment to the family. Now I will admit that most have been written by anti-male femi-Nazi’s but still the media has taken and run with it. They have published the reports as if they came from God Himself. They have done what I expected them to do, they have taken an extreme liberal point of view, regardless of the facts, and have pushed it on the collective American conscience as a fact, using political correctness and guilt as its main arguments.
The basic idea of life with out men is not a new one, we saw this in the 60’s and 70’s when the bra burning femi-Nazi’s where in there hey-day, when everyone was all about equality of the female with no regards to the actual differences. We experimented with this with the gender neutral toys and the striping of masculinity from the male species. They have called murder reproduction rights and sexual deviances as lifestyle choices and have forced their point of view upon us as acceptance or die.
The attacks from the left are nothing new, but to me it seems that with the Obama era in play they have stepped up there attacks, become bolder and more outspoken. they use to hide behind what seemed like sound and sensible laws or ideas, but now the are open and bold about the anti-American and anti-God speak. They boldly claim the truth of there ideas as what they are, and the media eats it up.
It is a sad day when a society can rationalize the uselessness of men in the family life. When we can determine that a male is not necessary and is considered a detriment to the over all health of the family unit. They have or are trying to reduce the male to noting more than a sperm donor an object to be used and than discarded. They have, in their minds, reduced masculinity to a negative attribute, and elevated the femi-Nazi to a status of exalted. It is a sad and sick world when we allow the destruction of manhood.
The next target will be children, they will find a study or create a study that shows having children are a detriment to your health and lifestyle, oh wait, never mind, they already did this and won, it’s call abortion. How can one gender,regardless of sexual orientation, honestly think that the male is, well frankly, disposable? Just basic genetics tell you that a male is needed to keep the human race going. Well unless they have discovered away to reproduce with out the help of a male. Maybe they have uncovered the secret of the A-sexual life style… Who knows…
What I do know is that God created man and woman and it was very good. I do know that as of this point in history it takes one of each to make a new one and I also know that all studies, legitimate studies, prove that a complete traditional family is the best.
Maybe I am over reacting, but I don’t think so, the Obama generation is one hell bent on destroying the fabric of this nation, and now that they have their supreme leader in power they will stop at nothing, not even the truth or real facts will get in their way. They are a frights train on a collision course with destiny, a destiny that is in a flux at the moment.
Destiny in a Flux
What flux is destiny in? And who’s destiny am I talking about?
Second question first, I am referring to the American destiny, our collective destiny, the one that ties us all together as one nation, one people. The same destiny that lead to the discovery of the Americas, to the fight for independence and the beacon of freedom to the world. A destiny that defines us all as Americans the very same destiny that forged this great nation and created the land of liberty. They very destiny that the Statue of Liberty solutes each and everyday, and the very destiny that millions of refuges seek-out and risk life and limb for daily.
As for the first question, the flux is a paradigm shift of epic size and repercussions. The very fabric of this nation, the fabric that was sown with the treads of Christianity and liberty are being tugged and pulled, the fray is growing and the tear is increasing. The fabric that created the patchwork of America, with its many cultures and distinct interpretations of Her inhabitance is being bleached and patched over with a square of generic color, creating a quilt with no distention, yet all the time the battle cry of diversity is yelped from the hilltops. The flux is increasing its scope and range to now include the masculinity of humanity, relying on only the femininity of creation.
The modern cry of “I am woman, hear me roar” has been changed to “I am woman, no one else matters”. And the established media seems to be accepting this, more than just acceptance but more of a wholesale purchase of it. And they are more than willing to give out for free to the general public! This sickens me!
The ability for the minority left to gain so much press attention with non-truths and out and out lies never ceases to amaze me. The left has mastered the art of deception to the point of not recognizing the facts or truths of the issues. The lies become reality to the ones who tell the lie enough times. The mantra becomes the common place among the norm of the nation. Yet if the left were to take a true pulse of this nation they would find a very different reality. They would find a reality centered in the Christian tradition with right of center views. Yet they seem to miss this in all the research and reports they produce. the left is an a reality that is all there own. The flux in the forced shit the current administration and his cohorts are forcing upon the American public!
God willing, come this November we will have the courage to take back our country, remove t
he blinders of a Utopia and once again allow America to be who She is distend to be, a leader in the universe who stands for liberty and justice, one who will fight for the freedom of nations and the pursuit of happiness. One where men are not marginalized and where the most vulnerable do not have to fear for there little live before they can even see it.
The reality is simple, if we continue down this road we will not have to concern ourselves with outside terrorist, the femi-Nazis will take care of it all for them.
God Bless
Paul
| Psalm 91:1“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
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Ever had someone say something that just made you shake your head and ask yourself what was that, what just happened? Well sometimes that how life is, we just have to shake our heads and ask ourselves what just happened.
There are moments in life that I feel should not be explained, moments were we just accept life for what it is and move on. Many of the moments are special moments, moments that we are glad we are part of, moments that define us and create us. And some moments we want to redo, to take back, or at least we thing we do.
The moments that define us are not only the positive moments, in-fact I would argue that it is the negative moments that truly define us.
It is said that you find your true friends in crisis, and based on experience, I would have to agree. It is in the moment of crisis that friendships are created, solidified or broken, and I have had all three happen.
It is said that leaders are born out of a crises, that in the moment of need the natural leader will emerge. We have seen it in times of war and person crisis. We witness it in times of tragedies’ and destruction. These leaders are quiet people who perform there daily tasks with pride and diligent. Riding the wave of life, until the tsunami hits, the crisis creates opportunity and the leader will emerge.
Crisis creates opportunity and opportunity creates defining moments.
Paul
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Pride is a very strong emotion, one that has driven people to extremes. We have witnessed the pride of a man (or a woman) bring them down in a blaze of fire, and we have seen pride rebuild a man (or a woman) from the deepest despair life can offer.
Why is this, what makes one emotions so powerful and at the opposite ends of the spectrum.
This I can not answer, but I can offer my own insights on the topic. Anyone who reads my blogs an a regular basis will know that I often times return to the subject of EGO (Edging God Out), well I think Pride has a small place in EGO.
The pride that causes harm, pride that drives a man to extremes is a pride that is unhealthy.
To have pride in your work, in your life and in yourself and family is a very healthy, and necessary thing. It is when that pride overrides all, when that pride becomes the end all to all that is when it enters the EGO, that is when it becomes a destructive force, not only in your life but all around you.
When we feel that what we do is more important that others, or when we think that our actions are defining moments, when we place ourselves at the very center of life, the EGO has began its destruction.
How do we know when pride becomes EGO, were is that line? I think we all have a different thresh hold, but I also think we all know, internally, were it is.
For me, EGO is the evil part of my being, it is the original sin of Adam and Eve, it was there EGO’s that told them to eat of the fruit, to want to become god’s themselves. Pride, the feeling of being more than they were.
We need to be proud, we need that feeling and that emotion, but we need to control it, and not allow it to take over, when it takes over, that is when pride becomes EGO, a destructive force.
I am very proud of a the volume of work I have created, the programs I have developed but I am also very aware that there is always something more, something better out there, that what I have created is good, maybe even great, and I take great pride in the work, but I know I am only one of many. I will not allow my EGO to take hold of it, I do not, for one minute, think that what I have created is anything more than what it is.
Pride and EGO often times share the same fine line. It is easy to step on way or the other, Pride becoming EGO and EGO becoming pride. Careful where you step, look and see were you are headed and say on the side of pride.
Paul
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